My Kids Aren’t Me
When they were little, we always tried to find things about our kids that were like us. He has your nose, your eyes, or your personality. Now that my two boys are no longer children but grown men I spend more time looking at how much they are not like me and it makes me smile.
I was never an adventurous soul. I was too scared to step outside my comfort zone. In all truth the reason I stayed behind the line is because I didn’t want to mess up or feel like I’d done something wrong. (My run for SOS and Cancer changed all of that)
Now I have two sons who, at the age of 23 and 21 are stepping so far outside the box that I get a lump in my throat just writing this blog.
My youngest son, Jess, left the security of his friends, a wonderful girlfriend and a job to live in a remote corner of Alaska to become a fishing guide. He has little communication with the outside world. He can’t call out, he can Skype a little, but for the most part he has isolated himself and in doing so found himself.
My oldest son Jake leaves home in about a month to study abroad in Argentina. He will walk away from a secure job, sell his car, pack his bags and go to a country where his culture will do him little good as he finds a new culture.
My sons are the bravest guys I know. I would have never done what they are doing. Not because I didn’t want to but because I’d have been too afraid to make a mistake.
The other day my words came back to me in an email from Jess. He said he banged the boat around some rocks a few times as he was learning to maneuver the boat on the river. He wrote and said;” But dad you have to fail if you are ever going to succeed right.” I felt a tear well up in my eye because that is now my life. In many ways my sons have helped me to become the man God created me to be not a chicken afraid to try something new.
Stepping out is not natural for me even though many of you probably think the opposite. For my sons stepping inside the box is more difficult.
They have shown me how to live and now their mother and I get to watch as they go higher, wider and deeper than we’ll ever go.
God, thank you for these moments. They make the tough times so worth it. I can’t wait to see where you take us.
My friends do not allow yourself to be trapped by what you thought. Do not sit back and live life in drudgery. Today, do something outside the norm. Call someone for coffee, take on that project, make the phone call you’ve been avoiding. Come on, this is life; it’s not going to kill you.
Dog Days of Summer
Today was one of those easy summer days you don’t get very often. There’s usually a list of things that need to be done. We went for a seven mile run in the morning but the rest of Saturday was all ours.
We met up with our son Jess’ girlfriend, Kirty Wernick and her new puppy Kenai. The puppy is growing up so quickly.
It was so great to see Kirty. It was like being with a part of our son. We met and thought she would only have time to chat for an hour or so. Instead we ended up sitting there for several hours. I guess being with us and us being with her reminded us of someone we all miss.
We are all so happy for him and know this is a huge step in his life but we miss him too. It’s nice to have people you care so much about that you miss them. It’s also nice to know our son has a girlfriend who loves him as much as we do.
Later, at the Oakway Barber Shop, my wife was looking for hair products and I struck up a conversation with three young men from Saudi Arabia. They are at the U of Oh studying English. We had a great talk and plan to get together for coffee or lunch or maybe have them over to our house for dinner soon.
This is Poppie, the new dog that frequents the home where Chip, my brother-in-law lives. We stopped by to see Chip and just sat around drinking Slurpee’s and holding the dog.
I love days like this when you have nothing big planned, you get your exercise out of the way early and spend the day dinking around with the one’s you love and meeting new people. Add a couple of dogs to the mix and you’ve got the perfect “Dog Days of summer.”
Now, let’s go grab some dinner. The day is not over yet.
Living My Dream, In My Stream.
As I look out over the river the view is too much for my eyes, even rougher on my mind. A mountain seems to jet straight up from the rivers edge into the sky eight-thousand-feet.
The water is rushing around my legs as I stand waist high in freezing cold glacier water. The color is crystal blue but not clear enough to see through. All around me huge salmon roll up out of the water and dive back down as if luring me deeper into a trance of trying to catch them.
Just a few feet from me, casting as if synchronized by some silent orchestra are my brother-in-law and my youngest son Jess. This is his trip, Jess’ trip, his dream and it’s unfolding before his father’s eyes.
As I see this young bearded man, casting, smiling, fishing, I realize this is his place. This is the world where he feels the most at peace. It’s not my world, although I love it. It is as if God dropped me into a canvas to see who Jess really is and who he will be.
As I watch this life that his mother and I helped bring into this world I find something in my throat that chokes me, some call this “getting a lump in their throat.” My heart fills with pride as I see this young man living his dream.
Then, the vision turns to me. There next to me is my Heavenly Father, with the same lump in his throat and the same pride beaming in his spirit but He is looking at me, His son, His creation.
I say to Him; “thank you for giving me two sons and allowing me to see them for who they are.” He says to me; “Do you know why I brought you here?” I say;” sort of.” He looks at me and says: “Not only do I want you to see Jess for who he is and Jake (who is at home) for who I made him to be, I want you, Rick, to see that I see you the same way.”
When we are in our element, doing the thing that makes us dance, or sing or fill with great joy, God, the creator of the universe looks at us the same way I see Jess right now.
Now that is overwhelming to me. As I write these words I find tears in my eyes. I am living my dream. I always wanted to be “this guy.” It doesn’t matter what I do for a living or what position I hold or how much money I have, it’s all about this, right now, right here.
When we truly allow God to take us through or into our wilderness we find Him on the other side. We discover a father who not only created us but also loves to see us simply being who He created us to be, not who we think we should be or are told by others that we need to be.
So, here I am, in the middle of my stream, which is this computer screen, casting and throwing, not a fishing line but words that make up lines. What I catch is not my business or even my goal. It’s simply casting that makes my heart sing.
And over my shoulder, just to the left of me, right now, is my Father, smiling as His son is living the dream.
Blue Diamonds:Rules or Guidelines
Standing at the top of the ski slope, you look ahead and see a clear path down the mountain. To each side, posted on trees are blue diamond markers. These are warnings to let you know the safe area to travel.
mvi_1657 (take a second to watch video)
For most skiers, the wide parts of the path are easy. Most aren’t afraid to fly down the mountain in the open spots because the trails are groomed and you can see others have passed this way before.
But what happens when the path becomes narrow? What do you do when the diamonds turn to red warnings that tell you few go this direction and to do so means greater risk? What do you do when tree’s and other obstacles get in the way? Many of us retreat and stay on the safe paths.
I find our faith walk is a lot like that mountain and those diamonds. We are taught to spend so much time looking for the blue diamonds and the more traveled trail that we avoid the narrow spots. We see the blue diamonds, not as guideposts where decisions are made but hard and fast rules to keep us safe. (Religion-verses Relationship)
Sometimes safe is smart. But sometimes it’s simply a way to keep from growing.
I’m not suggesting we all slap on a pair of ski’s and fly down the hill paying no attention to the warnings. What I am suggesting is that we stop being afraid of the narrow path, the path less traveled and the red diamonds. The key to skiing on the edge is spending so much time with the expert (God) so you know when to stay inside the lines and when to take a chance in the wilderness area and you find life is a lot more fun.
