I met a friend, Shimon Cohen for coffee today and we were talking about labels. Not the kind you find in clothing, although those labels are irritating too.  We were talking about the labels we love to place on each other. This got me thinking about the similarity of the two.

Since announcing my candidacy for Secretary of State, as a Republican, I’ve seen the ugly side of labels.  For some, the fact that I am a Republican is like that scratchy tag in the back of a shirt. They won’t get past it. Other’s like it because it seems to tell them something about what’s inside. But I see something happening in the fashion industry and in our culture that gives me great hope.

Tags or labels don’t work anymore. We as consumers are sick of labels. We don’t want them in our shirts or in our politics. A tag, or label was designed to give you a bit of information about what you were buying. But the amount of information on that label isn’t enough to tell you the whole story of what it is that makes this product unique.

I see this, not just in politics. Look at religion. When someone walks up to someone who calls himself or herself a follower of Christ the first thing they want to know is “What church do you go to?”

Why? I mean seriously, why is that important? I think we believe we need to know that bit of information so we can apply the proper label to that person. Why?

We need to get with the times. The clothing industry has learned labels are irritating and has started printing the information on the cloth. I know people who won’t buy clothing if it’s got the irritating label.  I think the same thing needs to happen in religion and in politics. It doesn’t mean you can’t identify with a certain church, club or political party, but don’t let the label define what’s inside. If you do people won’t buy it anymore.

Driving home from Yachats I had this weird thought as I was looking at the double yellow lines painted down the center of a stretch of highway. Those lines are there to warn us not to pass because the road ahead may be dangerous. They are there to say, Rick, don’t do it, be patient and wait for a nice long straight away.

How often are there warning signs in our lives that tell us to slow down and yet we ignore them and try to pass anyway? I’m thinking of moments where my wife says Rick don’t worry about that there’s nothing you can do about it, and yet, I worry and try to fix it or get it done.  How many times have I tossed and turned in my sleep, thinking about something I can’t change at that particular moment, and yet I worry anyway? I say to myself, ignore it and go to sleep.

There are yellow lines painted all over our lives. Warnings that say, you don’t need that, take a break, rest, don’t do any work, sleep a little longer, go ahead and go to the gym, or not.

As I was watching those yellow lines pass by my car I thought to myself and now share it with you, we need to pay more attention to the signs. We need to ignore the sounds that distract us and get done what we can and delegate the rest.

I’m looking for yellow lines.

We ran into a couple today that has a lot in common with us but they don’t know it. My wife and I love to just be around each other. After nearly 25 years of marriage we have plenty of history. I love that about us. We like to walk along the beach and look at people’s homes and wonder who the people are or who own the home or what they do for a living. One of our favorite houses is in Yachats. It sits at the end of this road perched on a rocky bluff at the waters edge. This house is so cool. Lots of angles, but still somewhat traditional and it comes complete with a small guest cottage. About an hour ago, we were walking down the street, to the bench, near the house we like when many of our questions were answered.

The home’s owner was in the yard building a fire pit that he and his wife were designing. He started chatting with us. We ended up in his home looking at the interior and hearing the story of who he was, what he had done and why they had built this house this way. He showed us the cabinets made of an old apple tree that had fallen to the ground near his home in West Linn. He told us he was a High School Teacher and that he had just retired. He seemed a little lost. He retired two weeks ago and wasn’t sure what he is going to do with his life. I’m not judging him. I understand the lost feeling of giving up a long time career. He never did ask what I did for a living. I was so relieved. I talk enough about what I did, what I’m doing and what I hope to do in the future. I just needed a break and he gave it to me by not asking a single question.

We walked away from our favorite house understanding more of its history and its owner. The stories we had made up all these years were shattered by reality. I’ll never look at a house the same way again. We judge people by what we see, by the standards we set, by the ideals we live by. Sometimes we’re just plain wrong.

The fog is moving in on the Oregon Coast. The blue sky is now gray. The ocean that was a bright as a sapphire now looks more like sterling silver. A change in weather tends to give a different view of what’s going on around us. The same is true of relationships. When you get to know people, rather than make assumptions, clarity has a way of showing up even when the fog is rolling in.